


Easy, Breezy, Beautiful

by De_Nugis



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Episode: s15e05: coda, M/M, Sam's Hair Is a Main Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2021-01-31 11:08:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21445234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/De_Nugis/pseuds/De_Nugis
Summary: Sam reaches out to Cas to deal with the God-visions. Cas has important input.
Relationships: Castiel/Sam Winchester
Comments: 20
Kudos: 76





	Easy, Breezy, Beautiful

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, I wrote a coda for an episode I haven't seen yet. Yes, it's cracky Sastiel. No, I do not have regrets.

The procedure is rather like a Vulcan mind-meld. Suspiciously like a Vulcan mind-meld, in fact. Didn’t Metatron give Cas some popular culture data dump at some point?

Sam squints sideways at Cas, but Cas’s face is perfectly grave, like a doctor. Sam gets hold of himself. If seeing a replay of his all-fratricide-all-the-time dreams requires Cas to touch Sam’s hair, it’s probably even more uncomfortable for Cas than it is for Sam. 

Cas’s hand drops and he stares into space for a bit. Now that there’s no telepathic scalp-massage going on Sam can concentrate on the underlying dread.

“Thoughts, Cas?” says Sam. 

Cas meets Sam’s eyes after a moment’s hesitation. It must be obvious to him, too — if there’s a quantum connection between Sam and Chuck, then they have a way to get at Chuck. Cas won’t like it, but it’s not like with Dean. Cas will be able to be objective. Cas is going to need to be the objective one.

“Your hair looked beautiful,” says Cas finally. “In the scene where you fell from the balcony. It was windswept. I enjoyed that part.”

Sam’s not sure if he says the _what the fuck_ out loud or if his face says it for him.

“Your brother shouldn’t stab you,” says Cas, like that will address any concerns Sam’s expression suggests he may be having. Sam goes on staring. “It would be better if that didn’t happen. But you should jump from heights when you have the opportunity. Smaller heights, obviously.”

Sam isn’t even going to try to deal with this.

“Thoughts _on the visions_? On Chuck? Thoughts on how to _defeat God_?”

Cas straightens and shakes his head vigorously, like he’s shedding his preoccupations.

“I’ll think about it,” he says. He gives Sam another long, inscrutable, angelic look and, OK, this is it, the whole hair weirdness postponed the moment, but Cas must be realizing now that Sam might not be getting out of this one. Sam tries to look preemptively resolute, maybe even noble.

“Perhaps you should experiment with conditioners,” says Cas. “Or a cream rinse. We’ll have to work carefully to recreate the full effect. There was a remarkable fullness and sheen.”

He nods decisively and goes out without another word. Sam sits down and buries his face in his hands, carefully avoiding his hair. He tries to decide between freaked and reprieved.

His phone dings two days later. At least Cas is texting again.

_I’ve been investigating_, Sam reads. _Many people speak favorably of Aveda products_. 

Sam puts the phone down. Then he picks it up again and powers it off. He might be safer sticking with Chuck’s endings.


End file.
